May 30, 2016

What's on TV? Thursday, June 5, 1958

I hope you're all having a pleasant Memorial Day today. As everyone knows, this marks the unofficial start of summer, although down here in Texas it feels as if it's been summer for a few weeks. And if the weather isn't hot enough for you, the TV certainly should be. This week's journey takes us to Iowa, the western neighbors to the land of my birth. I don't know if I'm correct, but I think this is the first time we've done an all-Iowa edition, and in honor of the occasion (since I don't know that much about Iowa television), I present you with the best jokes Minnesotans tell about Iowa.



WMT, Channel 2 (Cedar Rapids) (CBS)

Morning


08:00a
Captain Kangaroo

08:45a
CBS Morning News (Richard C. Hottelet)

09:00a
Garry Moore

09:30a
How Do You Rate?

10:00a
Arthur Godfrey

10:30a
Dotto

11:00a
Love of Life

11:30a
Search for Tomorrow

11:45a
The Guiding Light

Afternoon


12:00p
CBS News (Walter Cronkite)

12:05p
News, Sports, Weather (local)

12:15p
Farm and Markets

12:30p
As the World Turns

01:00p
Home Fare

01:30p
House Party (guest yoga expert Clara Spring)

02:00p
The Big Payoff

02:30p
The Verdict is Yours

03:00p
A Brighter Day

03:15p
The Secret Storm

03:30p
The Edge of Night

04:00p
Marshal “J”

04:45p
Movie – “One Way Ticket”

05:55p
News, Weather, Sports (local)

Evening


06:15p
Douglas Edwards With the News

06:30p
Sergeant Preston

07:00p
Richard Diamond

07:30p
Climax!

08:30p
Playhouse 90

10:00p
Compass

10:30p
News, Weather (local)

10:50p
Tower Theater – “It’s in the Bag”

Have you heard about the Iowan who got so fed up with Minnesota that he decided he was going to blow up the whole state? He went out and got a stick of dynamite and threw it across the state line where it landed at the foot of a Minnesotan, who looked down, picked it up, lit the fuse and threw it back.


KGLO, Channel 3 (Mason City) (CBS)

Morning


08:00a
Captain Kangaroo

08:45a
CBS Morning News (Richard C. Hottelet)

09:00a
Garry Moore

09:30a
How Do You Rate?

10:00a
Arthur Godfrey

10:30a
Dotto

11:00a
Love of Life

11:30a
Search for Tomorrow

11:45a
The Guiding Light

Afternoon


12:00p
News (local)

12:30p
As the World Turns

01:00p
Beat the Clock

01:30p
House Party (guest yoga expert Clara Spring)

02:00p
The Big Payoff

02:30p
The Verdict is Yours

03:00p
A Brighter Day

03:15p
The Secret Storm

03:30p
The Edge of Night

04:00p
Bob Cavanaugh

05:00p
To Be Announced

05:35p
Time Out For Talk

05:45p
Douglas Edwards With the News

Evening


06:00p
News, Weather (local)

06:30p
Annie Oakley

07:00p
Richard Diamond

07:30p
Climax!

08:30p
Playhouse 90

10:00p
News (local)

10:30p
Heart of the City

Q: What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Iowa?
A: Prom.


KTVO, Channel 3 (Ottumwa) (CBS, NBC)

Afternoon


12:00p
Beat the Clock

12:30p
House Party (guest yoga expert Clara Spring)

01:00p
The Big Payoff

01:30p
The Verdict is Yours

02:00p
Matinee Theater (color)

03:00p
Queen for a Day

03:45p
The Secret Storm

04:00p
Movie – “The Iroquis Trail”

05:15p
Douglas Edwards With the News

Evening


06:10p
Weather (local)

06:15p
The Huntley-Brinkley Report

06:30p
Sergeant Preston

07:00p
You Bet Your Life

07:30p
Playhouse 90

09:00p
Ernie Ford (guest Phyllis Kirk)

09:30p
Trackdown

10:00p
Movie – “Wicked Woman”

I don't often run into University of Iowa graduates, but when I do I always ask for large fries.


WHBF, Channel 4 (Rock Island) (CBS)

Morning


08:00a
Captain Kangaroo

08:45a
CBS Morning News (Richard C. Hottelet)

09:00a
Garry Moore

09:30a
How Do You Rate?

10:00a
Arthur Godfrey

10:30a
Dotto

11:00a
Love of Life

11:30a
Search for Tomorrow

11:45a
The Guiding Light

Afternoon


12:00p
My Little Margie

12:30p
As the World Turns

01:00p
Beat the Clock

01:30p
House Party (guest yoga expert Clara Spring)

02:00p
The Big Payoff

02:30p
The Verdict is Yours

03:00p
A Brighter Day

03:15p
The Secret Storm

03:30p
The Edge of Night

04:00p
Looneyville Lighthouse

05:00p
Woody Woodpecker

05:30p
The Mickey Mouse Club

Evening


06:00p
Sky King

06:30p
Sergeant Preston

07:00p
Richard Diamond

07:30p
Climax!

08:30p
Playhouse 90

10:00p
Official Detective

10:30p
News, Weather (local)

10:50p
Movie – “Sign of the Ram”

In Minnesota, if people are told they have six months to live, they move to Iowa,where it seems like a decade.


WOI, Channel 5 (Ames) (ABC)

Morning


10:45a
Welcome Mat

11:00a
Magic Window

Afternoon


12:00p
News (local) 

12:15p
Farm and Markets

12:45p
Today’s Homemaker

01:00p
Movie – TBA

02:00p
Liberace

02:30p
Life With Elizabeth

03:00p
American Bandstand

03:30p
Do You Trust Your Wife?

04:00p
American Bandstand

05:00p
Woody Woodpecker

05:30p
The Mickey Mouse Club

Evening


06:00p
777th Bengal Lancers

06:30p
Circus Boy

07:00p
Zorro

07:30p
The Real McCoys

08:00p
Pat Boone (guests Jack Carter, Gary Crosby)

08:30p
Navy Log

09:00p
Make Me Laugh

09:30p
26 Men

10:00p
News (local)

10:20p
Nightwatch – “The Lone Gun”

Q: What's the only good thing to come out of Iowa?
A: Interstate 35.


WOC, Channel 6 (Davenport) (NBC)

Morning


07:00a
Today (visit to Washington, D.C.)

09:00a
Romper Room (Miss Gwen)

09:30a
Treasure Hunt

10:00a
The Price Is Right

10:30a
Truth or Consequences

11:00a
Tic Tac Dough

11:30a
It Could Be You

Afternoon


12:00p
News (local) 10 Especially For You

12:30p
Movie – “Cluny Brown” (part 2)

01:30p
Kitty Foyle

02:00p
Matinee Theater (color)

03:00p
Queen for a Day

03:45p
Modern Romances

04:00p
I Married Joan

04:30p
Captain Ken

05:30p
News, Sports, Weather (local)

05:45p
The Huntley-Brinkley Report

Evening


06:00p
Jim Bowie

06:30p
Tic Tac Dough (color)

07:00p
You Bet Your Life

07:30p
Dragnet

08:00p
The People’s Choice

08:30p
Ernie Ford (guest Teresa Brewer)

09:00p
Rosemary Clooney (guests John Raitt, Bob Williams) (color)

09:30p
Boots and Saddles

10:00p
Mike Hammer

10:30p
News, Weather (local)

10:50p
Soiree

11:00p
Jack Paar Tonight (guests Sam Levenson, Shelley Berman)

Q: What's the difference between an Iowa football player and a dollar?
A: You can get four quarters out of a dollar.


KWWL, Channel 7 (Waterloo) (NBC)

Morning


07:00a
Today (visit to Washington, D.C.)

09:00a
Dough Re Mi

09:30a
Treasure Hunt

10:00a
The Price Is Right

10:30a
Truth or Consequences

11:00a
Tic Tac Dough

11:30a
It Could Be You

Afternoon


12:00p
Midday Matinee – “Roaring City”

01:30p
Kitty Foyle

02:00p
Matinee Theater (color)

03:00p
Queen for a Day

03:45p
Modern Romances

04:00p
I Married Joan

04:30p
Movie – “The Seige”

05:30p
News, Sports, Weather (local)

Evening


06:15p
The Huntley-Brinkley Report

06:30p
Tic Tac Dough (color)

07:00p
You Bet Your Life

07:30p
Dragnet

08:00p
Dr. Christian

09:00p
Rosemary Clooney (guests John Raitt, Bob Williams) (color)

09:30p
Jane Wyman

10:00p
News (local)

10:30p
Jack Paar Tonight (guests Sam Levenson, Shelley Berman)

Q: What do tornadoes and graduates from the University of Iowa have in common?
A: They both end up in trailer parks.


KRNT, Channel 8 (Des Moines) (CBS)

Morning


08:00a
Captain Kangaroo

08:45a
CBS Morning News (Richard C. Hottelet)

09:00a
Garry Moore

09:30a
How Do You Rate?

10:00a
Arthur Godfrey

10:30a
Dotto

11:00a
Mary Jane Chinn

11:30a
Search for Tomorrow

11:45a
The Guiding Light

Afternoon


12:00p
Bill Riley Time

12:30p
News (Don Soliday)

12:40p
Bill Riley Time

12:55p
Pastor’s Study

01:00p
Love of Life

01:30p
House Party (guest yoga expert Clara Spring)

02:00p
The Big Payoff

02:30p
The Verdict is Yours

03:00p
A Brighter Day

03:15p
The Secret Storm

03:30p
The Edge of Night

04:00p
 As the World Turns

04:30p
Beat the Clock

05:00p
Bill Riley Theater

05:45p
Douglas Edwards With the News

Evening


06:00p
News, Weather (local)

06:15p
Gordon Gammack

06:30p
Sergeant Preston

07:00p
Richard Diamond

07:30p
Climax!

08:30p
Playhouse 90

10:00p
News (local)

10:30p
Sports World

11:00p
Jack Paar Tonight (guests Sam Levenson, Shelley Berman)

Q: What do you call an IQ of 76?
A: Des Moines.


KCRG, Channel 9 (Cedar Rapids) (ABC)

Afternoon


12:55p
News, Weather (local)

01:00p
Film Feature

01:30p
Movie – “I Walked With a Zombie”

02:30p
Trouble With Father

03:00p
American Bandstand

03:30p
Do You Trust Your Wife?

04:00p
American Bandstand

05:00p
Woody Woodpecker

05:30p
The Mickey Mouse Club

Evening


06:00p
Kit Carson

06:30p
Circus Boy

07:00p
Zorro

07:30p
The Real McCoys

08:00p
Pat Boone (guests Jack Carter, Gary Crosby)

08:30p
Navy Log

09:00p
Target

09:30p
Boots and Saddles

10:00p
News (local)

10:10p
Movie – “You’ll Find Out”

11:15p
News, Weather (local)

Q: Why do all football stadiums in Iowa have artificial turf?
A: To keep the cheerleaders from grazing on the field.


WHO, Channel 13 (Des Moines) (NBC)

Morning


06:55a
Daily Word

07:00a
Today (visit to Washington, D.C.)

09:00a
Romper Room (Miss Nancy)

09:30a
Treasure Hunt

10:00a
The Price Is Right

10:30a
Truth or Consequences

11:00a
Tic Tac Dough

11:30a
It Could Be You

Afternoon


12:00p
News (local)

12:10p
Cartoons

12:40p
Movie – “The Caribbean Mystery”

01:45p
Arranging Flowers

02:00p
Matinee Theater (color)

03:00p
Queen for a Day

03:45p
Modern Romances

04:00p
I Married Joan

04:30p
Popeye

05:05p
Movie – “A Dispatch from Reuter’s” (part 1)

Evening


06:05p
Weather and News (local)

06:15p
The Huntley-Brinkley Report

06:30p
Tic Tac Dough (color)

07:00p
You Bet Your Life

07:30p
Dragnet

08:00p
The People’s Choice

09:00p
Rosemary Clooney (guests John Raitt, Bob Williams) (color)

09:30p
State Trooper

10:00p
News (local)

10:30p
Movie – “Claudia and David”

Did you hear the one about the time Iowa played Minnesota in football? A train running past the stadium sounded its horn; the Minnesota players thought it meant the end of the half and ran off the field. Four plays later, Iowa scored. (Obviously these football jokes go way back.)


KQTV, Channel 21 (Fort Dodge) (NBC)

Afternoon


01:00p
Hi-Fi Music Room

01:30p
Bingo Matinee

02:00p
Matinee Theater (color)

03:00p
Queen for a Day

03:45p
Modern Romances

04:00p
I Married Joan

04:30p
Eve’s Kitchen

05:30p
Dick Johnson

05:45p
San Francisco Beat

Evening


06:15p
The Huntley-Brinkley Report

06:30p
Vacation Time

07:00p
You Bet Your Life

07:30p
Dragnet

08:00p
Schlitz Playhouse

09:00p
Rosemary Clooney (guests John Raitt, Bob Williams) (color)

09:30p
Our Miss Brooks

10:00p
News (local)

10:15p
Charlie Chan

10:45p
Sports Review

But just to be fair, since I'm not much of a fan of Minnesota anymore either, I'll end with this one:

Q: What do you call 50 men sitting around watching the Super Bowl on television?
A: The Minnesota Vikings.



3 comments:

  1. I wonder how many CBS affiliates in Iowa had color capacity (the network was still running occasional color broadcasts until Bill Paley banned them in early 1960). We know KTVO does only because it's dualed with NBC and carried one of their shows in color)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I always thought that Minnesotans had more disdain for Wisconsin than for Iowa!

    ReplyDelete
  3. If these are the best jokes ...
    ... I'd hate to read the bad ones ...

    Since I'm here, and I have no real reason to put this up, I will anyway:

    This past weekend, I read of the passing of a TV actress named Rosanna Huffman.
    Never heard of her?
    Rosanna Huffman didn't break out of the "supporting" category, but she had a good life anyway.
    From 1969, until his passing in 1987, she was the wife of Richard Levinson, of the team of Levinson and Link.
    If you check her credits at IMDb, you'll find that many of her roles were in shows written or produced by her husband and his partner.
    Not all of them; Rosanna Huffman was a good working actress, who worked when she wanted to.

    I looked up one of her shows, an early episode of Murder She Wrote.
    It's the 16th episode of the first season, "Tough Guys Don't Die", written by Peter S. Fischer; it marked the debut of Harry McGraw, Jerry Orbach's recurring private eye character.
    The story is about Harry's PI partner getting murdered, and Harry and Jessica join forces to crack the case.
    Rosanna Huffman plays the partner's widow; small part, but she does well by it.
    Also appearing: the partner's secretary, played by Margery Nelson - off-camera, Mrs. William Link.
    The wives don't have any scenes together, but from what I've read, the two families were quite close all their lives (the Links are both still around, by the way).

    Just thought I'd mention it ...

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for writing! Drive safely!